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O Mother Where Art Thou?

By Patrick Drury
Printed in the October 2003 Newsletter of the
St. Joseph County Right to Life

 

In the early months of 1998, Cynthia W***** was considering where to spend her days as an undergraduate in college, deciding between the University of Notre Dame and the University of Virginia.  As destiny would have it, she chose Virginia.  I am eternally grateful of that choice, since it was at Virginia that she and I met for the first time.  It was at Virginia, three years after she sent in her acceptance letter, that I proposed to her.  And it was at Virginia, while she and I were preparing for our upcoming marriage and life together, that Cynthia was once again confronted with a decision to attend Notre Dame.  It seems destiny was still at play.

Cynthia was accepted at Harvard’s Divinity School and at Notre Dame to pursue a master’s degree in theology.  After carefully weighing the options—Notre Dame offered a full scholarship and a stipend; the cost of living in South Bend is far cheaper than in Cambridge; and frankly, Harvard’s football team is nothing to write home about—Cynthia finally accepted an offer to matriculate at Notre Dame.  It was years in the making, but it seemed she was destined somehow to end up in South Bend.  Ironically, she wasn’t the only one.

A curious historian can look back through old copies of The Dome, Notre Dame’s yearbook, to research the changing trends of the university.  If you were to pick up the 1979 edition, you might be interested in the personalities who spoke that year, including Ralph Nader, Phil Donahue, and Steve Martin.  A music lover would note performances by such big names as Bruce Springsteen, Neil Young, The Beach Boys, John Denver, and Aerosmith.  A football fan could relive Joe Montana and the 8-3 Irish orchestrating a miraculous come-from-behind victory over Houston in the Cotton Bowl.

What you won’t find in The Dome that year is any mention of Kathy D*****.  Kathy received a BA in American Studies in May of 1979, but her photo is not included with the other seniors.  She took a leave of absence the previous fall, so she was not present when yearbook pictures were being taken.  It had been a difficult year for Kathy, but despite missing an entire semester and arriving late that Spring, she received her degree and entered the Jesuit Volunteer Corps to become a schoolteacher in Cleveland, Ohio.

In 1968 my father graduated from Case Western Reserve University Law School in Cleveland.  He and my mother, who were married the previous summer, lived in a suburb called Shaker Heights.  My mother was a schoolteacher.  Eleven years later, when Kathy arrived in Cleveland, John and Joanne Drury were long gone, raising their two boys in northern Virginia.  But their paths had already crossed.

It seems to me that life is a crossroads of choices.  One person’s seemingly minute decision can have infinite effects on the future patchwork of another’s existence.  If Cynthia had not chosen the University of Virginia, she and I never would have met, we never would have married, and I never would have moved to South Bend.  If my mother and father had not chosen to move to the Washington, DC area after he graduated from law school in Cleveland, they never would have contacted Arlington’s Catholic Charities when they realized they were unable to conceive.  If Anthony D***** and his family had not chosen to move from Illinois to Virginia while his daughter Kathy was in college, they too would not have contacted Arlington’s Catholic Charities when she became pregnant at the end of her junior year.

And if Kathy had chosen another option available to her, I never would have been given the gift of my life.

In April of 2002, I made a decision I had been contemplating since I was very young.  I can’t remember the first time my parents told me I was adopted: I have always known.  Growing up, it was simply a part of who I was.  Along with that facet of my life came an innate desire to someday meet my birthmother, to thank her for the sacrifice she chose to make in order to give me an opportunity to live.  I could never shake that curiosity, so a few months before getting married, I set in motion a process that over a year later would change my life.  Like my parents and my birthmother before me, I chose to contact Catholic Charities of the Diocese of Arlington.

I had only a slight inkling of what it would entail to track down the woman who gave birth to me.  The two-stage process involved plenty of paperwork, some fees, and a hefty chunk of time.  The first stage provided me with what is called a Heritage Summary, which explained without identifying information the circumstances of my birth and adoption.  It also described in vague terms my biological family and extended family.  I received my copy in August of 2002, and spent some time deciding whether or not to continue the process.  By January of 2003, a month that includes both my birthday and the anniversary of Roe v. Wade, I had decided to forge ahead and try my luck at the second stage of my adoption search.  This was the tricky part.

It is important to realize when initiating a search of this nature, that not all stories have fairytale endings.  Catholic Charities might not be able to locate my birthmother.  She may no longer be alive.  In the event that she is found, would she be interested in contacting me?  Perhaps that chapter of her life has long been closed and tucked away, never to be reopened.  If she does want to meet me, what will she be like?  Are my expectations of her realistic?  Will I be disappointed?  Will she be disappointed?  How will this affect my family?  Does she have a family now?  How will it affect them?  Etc, etc…  This process is not to be taken lightly.

Because of all these circumstances, I filled out the remaining paperwork, sent in the corresponding fees, and promptly pushed it all out of my mind.  Three months later when I received an e-mail from the caseworker in charge of my search, my heart skipped a beat.  I was afraid to open it.  With my wife by my side, I soon discovered that my birthmother had been located, and she was interested in meeting me.  I had been thinking about this day for most of my life, but now what?  My mother and father encouraged me to make contact, alleviating any fears I had that they would feel threatened or jealous.  So on May 6, 2003, just twenty-five years after my conception, I decided I would phone her.

“Hello.”

“May I speak with Kathy please?”

“This is Kathy.”

“Kathy Waddill?” (D***** is her maiden name.)

“Yes.”

“This is Patrick Drury calling from South Bend, Indiana.”

“Is your birthday January 11, 1979?”

Since that initial phone call, there have been many others.  Kathy came to Notre Dame to meet me for the first time soon afterwards.  Then Cynthia and I went to California to meet her husband and my two half sisters.  Both my father and my mother have had dinner with Kathy, and e-mails and pictures are being sent back and forth almost weekly.  I also attended a family reunion, hosted by my biological grandfather, and was able to meet the rest of my maternal (biological) relatives.  Now that the summer is over, I'm able to look back and marvel at how well everything went.  It was truly a best case scenario.  People often ask how I feel about it all.  Now that I've had time to process everything, it has all seemed, strangely, very normal.

I would encourage anybody who is adopted to search, if they're curious, on two conditions: (1) you have the understanding and support of your parents, and (2) you realize that the search may not work out like you imagined.

Getting pregnant when you're not ready is a frightening thing, and it can lead many women to make a decision they would otherwise never dream of.  In moments of crisis, people do what they believe they have to do.  I truly hope that my story, and that of my birthmother's, can be an inspiration to women facing unplanned pregnancies.  Adoption is a wonderful choice.  Your sacrifice enables a couple to have the otherwise unattainable gift of children.  And it gives your baby a chance to live.
 

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Copyright © 2006 by Kathy Waddill.
All rights reserved.

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